About change

Last week I had an insightful talk with a friend on the topic of change. One of the questions that came to the surface was where even to start when wanting to make a change. It is a process. We touch based on a few of the topics, and my mind filled with further thoughts after our talk. So here comes a more detailed reflection on it.

I'd say the first step would be to identify what is that which you would want to have changed. Are you striving for a complete transformation or a partial adjustment in a specific area in your life?

If you don't know exactly where to start, imagine what would your ideal life look like. The Disney Dream as introduced to me by Andrina many years ago. If there were no limitations, if you could do or be whatever you wished (without "buts" or limiting thoughts). Let your mind run wild, make a drawing, make a mind map, write your thoughts, visualise, feel it. For some, it might be a difficult task since we are not used to be asked such a question. But give it a try… How would your ideal reality look like? For yourself as an individual, independent of what others expect you to do or be. Beyond what is given or known. What drives you? What makes your heart beat faster and makes you lose sight of time?

Bring that idea to the present moment. Which gap exists? Which step could you take in the shorter term that will bring you a little bit closer to that change? Which skills do you need to acquire? Are the people, the job, the habits, the city you are living in, in accordance with that which you wish to achieve? If not, which required steps would need to be taken to make the necessary adjustments incrementally?

Imagining major shifts is scary. It sometimes can be so overwhelming that it freezes you completely. That is when the "step by step" comes in. Break down that dream into smaller chunks. In little actions, to make it attainable.

You don't have to do it all by yourself. Sharing will give you new insights and possibly open new doors that you didn't know existed before. If you have the right people around, they will also give you the strength to take the more challenging steps. If you do not yet have a circle of motivators, maybe the first step would be to expand your bubble and find such people. It could be new friends, new groups, professionals, individuals pursuing the path you wish to follow, role models, etc. Surround yourself with added value, individuals that play as supporters in your journey.

There are so many tools and knowledge available nowadays. Try it out; see what works for you. Test it. Put it into practice. Keep the things that support you; drop the ones that are draining. Find your combo. What works for someone else is not necessarily your jam. But you'll only know yours once you try them out, at your own pace.

Things will start changing when you change. Movement brings movement.

There will be confusion during the way. Your mind will want to stop you; it wants to keep you safe, keep you in the comfort zone. Individuals you know might try to do the same. You might wake up in the morning, confused about what is happening.

Things will probably not develop 100% how you imagined, and stumbling blocks will come your way. It's not always only roses.

Embrace it, the ups and downs, be curious about it, see it as a playground. Gamify it. Make it fun. Desperation and occasional cries are entirely normal. The difficult times will be the pillars of your development.

Talk about it, find someone to exchange. Someone that will remind you of the essential aspects and give you the insights you need to giggle again.

Celebrate the achievements, as small as they might seem.

Take your time. It is not only when you reach a certain point that you will feel thrilled. You might not even notice when it happens because you're already focusing on all the other stuff you want to do. It's about making every day count and living every day, knowing that you are choosing the path you love.

Savouring every day fully and not expecting to start living only then when you reach a particular destination. Even if you are content with where you are and don't feel the need to change anything (which is also entirely valid), finding beauty in the little things gives extra joy. Doing more of what brings you to sparkle, that which makes your eyes shine, which drives you and makes you forget about time.

Life is too short not to live it. It is too short to hold grudges, to get caught up with the small stuff, to stay in situations that drain you down, not to try out new things and be open to the surprises that might be in store for you.

Our possibilities are limitless. With time, everything is achievable. Be true to yourself, and things will start flowing💙

Change can be scary but also worth all the drops of sweat. Why not just try it?